Dental records

I recently went to the Dentist for my 6 monthly check up.  It had been about 18 months since my last visit, but in my mind I was there for a 6 month check up.  If I wrote a policy and procedure for my life, I would go to the dentist every 6 months.  If I was to enforce the policy on myself my dentist could upgrade his car after making more money out of me.

Actually, my dentist and his dentist friends have made a lot of money out of my husband in recent years – not so much me.  I am a little bit of a disappointment to the dental community.  I will give you a dental history for myself, it may come in handy if I am in some terrible accident and they need to identify me by my dental records.  

Ok my dental history, I had braces when I was a teenager – I know it is suppose to be a rite of passage, however having braces when you have just started high school and have so many other events in your life to transition you through to pretend adulthood (I am still in denial about being an adult – all grown up and responsible for another person) is just cruel – I don’t think the braces really helped me become an adult – I am still trying to relate the event of those elastics springing out of your mouth after opening too wide to any adult experiences.  I had to get 4 teeth removed to have the braces – “to make room for my teeth to straighten up”.  I remember while having the teeth extracted under that spotlight and wearing those ugly oversized glasses, my mother and the orthodontist having a conversation about what a shame it was to have to remove 4 perfectly good teeth.  I remember thinking well don’t do it.  So that was my life lesson in preparation for loosing things in life that you have some control over, but not full control over, and having to say good bye to something that you really don’t want too.  Maybe learning to wear the plate every night after the braces were removed prepared me for routine and commitment – oh crap I just remembered I gave up wearing the plate after a couple of weeks – because it was removable and there was no dentist standing there each night telling me to wear it – otherwise your teeth really will move.

So painful tooth extraction of 4 perfectly good teeth, humiliation of being called metal mouth and a cut tongue and lips from braces and a horrid plate later – I was already scarred by the dentist experience and I was only 14!  I started to avoid those 6 monthly check ups as much as I could.  I didn’t need a dentist to clean and floss my teeth, I could manage my teeth myself – after all I was becoming an adult and having braces was my rite of passage into adulthood.  I avoided the dentist until I was about 21.  I found a dentist that was highly recommended (as my previous dentist had retired on my payment for braces and teeth extractions) and after hearing so many horror stories of people not getting their teeth checked and experiencing a slight jaw ache, I made an appointment.

The dentist was lovely – and very complimentary about my teeth and their condition.  I don’t think he believed that I hadn’t been to a dentist for about 7 years.  Anyway, I was no good for his retirement plan, as he could find no teeth that needed filling, all he could do was give me advice to never drink Orange juice, soft drinks or sweets – brush regularly, see him every 6 months, oh and a referral to a specialists to remove my wisdom teeth.

You can imagine my surprise after being told that I had very good teeth to be told that I had double impacted wisdom teeth that would need to be removed as a day surgery procedure.  Are you kidding.  More teeth being taken out and I have never been to hospital!  I met with the surgeon – who wore a bow tie – that could be a whole other blog article in itself.  Anyway he was very serious, despite the bow tie, and very matter of fact.  He reviewed my X-rays and said right the top ones are very close to your sinus nerves – so we could have some problems if I touch them.  I said well you won’t touch them will you?  He didn’t answer – he was doing that medical practitioner thing where they talk out loud about you, but don’t really want you to hear, and when you question them, they tell you not to panic, like you have been over reacting about hearing someone say they could cut a nerve that for all I know could stop me from smelling for the rest of my life.

Anyway, so I had the teeth out in a horrible procedure that left me swollen and in more pain than I had ever experienced before mentioning a sore jaw to the dentist.  I did get to eat a lot of ice cream which I am still love – mash potatoes however, I can’t eat mash anymore!  The experience also left me broke – who knew that having to go to a hospital for day surgery with a surgeon and an anaesthetist would cost so much – but not to worry, my health fund will pay – wrong – so after having to stop my health fund to be able to pay off my medical teams new cars, I was lighter in the teeth and wallet department.

Needless to say it was another 7 years before I visited the dentist again.  This time I was just about to head out to the UK on my travel rite of passage – the one that would open me up to the European culture and experience ancient historical sites and shop and party with all the other Aussies that were making the most of getting the no questions asked 2 year visa before you are 30 deal.  And having just seen the movie “Cast Away” with Tom Hanks where he experienced some dental problems on the tropical island that he was staying at with his friend Wilson.  I had noticed some marks on the bottom of my bottom molars and thought this is it – I am going to have to have more teeth removed or filled. 

This time I didn’t care for recommendations, so just went with the health fund dentist – I figured it would have to be cheaper.  I had joined a health fund again – after our lovely government decided to start taxing us if we weren’t in one.  So I rock up expecting the worse – only to be told that the markings were a result of cleaning my teeth too much!  Can you believe it – I hardly have any teeth left – and the ones I do have, I have been cleaning too much!

So I switched to an electric tooth brush on the dentist recommendations and took his advice to never drink Orange juice, soft drinks or sweets and smiled when he said he would see me in 6 months.  Now he was very pleasant looking and didn’t extract any teeth or fill any teeth – so bargained with myself and thought I could probably see him once a year (6 months was too much of a commitment) unless he wanted to invite me on a date – oh did I just type that.

I need to set the record straight – I did not date my dentist.  I meet my wonderful now husband and dated him instead.  He was a better choice – he is not qualified to extract teeth from me.  So back to the beginning of my blog – I went for my check up because I have been experiencing some jaw aching – similar to the ache prior to the wisdom teeth being extracted.  So this time I was convinced that I was going to require some fillings or remove the teeth that I had previously cleaned too much.  In addition to this I had noticed a slight gap appearing in the front of my teeth.

So I off I went – I was welcomed by my friendly dentist who is now also married, but I am allowed to say he is still very pleasant looking.  He listened to my ailments and then had a look at my teeth and said they were in perfect condition.  He asked if I had been stressed – he thought that I may be clenching my teeth.  He also said that he thinks that my teeth are starting to move because I had so many teeth extracted and I am clenching my teeth.

So I set out on my journey home and tried to work out if I was stressed – returning to work, having a semi important job, being sleep deprived, just being a mother in general – I guess I am a little stressed at time.

Last night as I was washing up and cleaning the kitchen, I realised I was clenching my teeth.  I hate washing up – I love housework – but only when I can keep it tidy by regular maintenance.  Being at work all day – then returning home, I return to my wonderful House Husband and beautiful daughter who is absolute delight and a blessing, but has not inherited any of my cleaning genes or germ phobias.  You may have guessed it she has inherited my husbands spirit of adventure and ability to look pass the mess and continue to enjoy life.  I have no doubt that my daughter and her Daddy have a fantastic and fun filled day each day while I am at work – cause I can see everything they have played with during the day left where ever the game finished.  They are very consider too they don’t make me waste my voice to ask what they had for lunch – they leave the dishes in the sink for me.

Don’t get me wrong – my husband does offer to wash up during the day – but I am such a control freak that I don’t let him – cause he can’t possible wash up the way I like!  Having said that – he doesn’t fight me on the topic – hence the dishes in the sink.

I have spent a lot of last night and this morning self talking and I am left with the consideration that if I don’t relax my control freak streak and accept the mess and the washing up – I will continue to clench my teeth so much that I will form a huge gap in my teeth, require cosmetic dentistry and have to get a second job to pay for it all – so would a dishwasher cost less that cosmetic surgery?

I think I need a dishwasher. 

Now back to my diet of soft drink and sweets and I start every day with Orange Juice – I always have – which has resulted in my one and only party trick being that I am nearly 40 and I still have no fillings!  I even beat my dentist – he has some fillings – obviously not drinking enough soft drinks or eating enough chocolate.